Hi guys! Maja told me how much you liked my last guest post, so here I am again. Long time no see! I’ve been totes busy eating, sleeping and chasing my squeaky frog toy around, but today I’m taking time out of my busy schedule to drop some knowledge on you. The holidays are upon us and many of you are probably getting ready to travel home to your families right now, so what better time for a travel routine post?
Dear Parisiennes: I get it now. Truly, I do. I apologize for my ridiculous behavior. We caught on a while ago to the fact that there is no single “Parisienne” style of dressing and that this French Voguette/Jane Birkin hybrid beast only exists in books and blogs and magazines, but it was still a fun idea to play with. All those breton shirts, all that je ne sais pas (typo, but I’m keeping it), and let’s not forget that effortlessness, right girls? So much effortlessness, massive amounts of effortlessness, it was borderline exhausting! Don’t worry though, you will be happy to know that there seems to be a completely new mythological girl to emulate.
No no, don’t leave! I swear, I’m not going to tell you to boost your protein intake, or bake a 100 calorie “chocolate cake” to satisfy your sweet tooth (because god knows that shit is NOT chocolate cake), or to follow the latest Instagram fitness queen. We’ve had enough of that, right? We’re sick of being told to “drop it like a squat” or “train insane or remain the same”. We don’t need the 10 minute butt workout, and if I see another blogger post a recipe of protein pancakes I swear I will scream! THEY DON’T TASTE LIKE PANCAKES!
Phew, now that I got that out of my system…
Hi everyone! My name is Kanutten and I will be your guest blogger for today. Maja needed a day off, so she propped me up on a chair and left me by the keyboard. This was fine by me – I am featured far too rarely on this thing and today I am taking it upon myself to make poodle the new black. Prepare your eyeballs, because I’m coming for them.
I’m permanently attached to my iPhone. Big surprise, most of us are after all. It is my phone, my camera, my notepad, my calendar, my radio, my music player, my weather report, my health tracker, my contact list, my source of entertainment and my means of communicating with anyone who is further than 30 feet away from me. I check it constantly, I post photos to Instagram several times a day, and I scroll through Tumblr or Pinterest when I’m bored. I only ever turn it off when I board a plane, and I turn it right back on again as soon as the plane has started taxiing upon arrival. I can’t imagine my life without it.
Which is why I decided to ditch it completely for a whole week.